What Age Is The Perks of Being a Wallflower Appropriate For? A Parent’s Guide

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Quick answer: The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky is best for ages 15 and up. It’s a moving coming-of-age story told in letters, but it includes sexual content, drug and alcohol use, a friend’s suicide, dating violence and the revelation of childhood sexual abuse.

Quick facts
Recommended age: 15+ (14+ for mature readers)
Reading level: Teen
Genre: YA coming-of-age fiction
Published: 1999
Main concerns: Sexual content, drugs, suicide, sexual abuse, mental illness
Movie rating: PG-13 (2012 film)

The Perks of Being a Wallflower is a beloved coming-of-age novel that many teens say changed their lives. It’s tender, funny and honest about mental health and trauma. It’s also one of the most frequently challenged books in schools because of its mature content. This guide explains what’s in it so you can decide when your teen is ready.

What Is The Perks of Being a Wallflower About?

Charlie is a shy, sensitive 15-year-old starting high school in the early 1990s. His best friend recently died by suicide, and Charlie writes letters to an anonymous “friend” to cope.

He’s befriended by two seniors, Sam and her stepbrother Patrick, who welcome him into their group of misfits. Charlie experiences his first parties, first love and the thrill of belonging, while struggling with depression and memories he’s buried.

The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky book cover

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Content Guide for Parents

Content Level What to Expect
Sexual content Moderate Discussions of sex and masturbation, a sexual encounter and other references; not explicit.
Drugs and alcohol Significant Charlie and friends smoke marijuana, drink and try LSD.
Suicide Present Charlie’s friend died by suicide before the book begins.
Abuse Significant Charlie’s sister’s boyfriend hits her, and Charlie realizes he was sexually abused as a child.
LGBTQ themes Present Patrick is gay and faces violence from his secret boyfriend’s father.
Positive messages Strong Friendship, belonging, seeking help and healing.

Age-by-Age Breakdown

Age Is The Perks of Being a Wallflower a Good Fit?
Under 14 Not recommended because of sexual content, drugs and abuse themes.
14 Possible for mature teens with a parent’s involvement.
15 to 17 The sweet spot.
Adults Many adults reread it with new appreciation.

Why Teens Connect With It

Charlie’s letters are honest about feeling lonely, anxious and different. Many readers recognize themselves in him and find comfort in how his friends accept him. The book also models getting help for mental health.

Stephen Chbosky directed the 2012 film adaptation, which is faithful and moving.

Is The Perks of Being a Wallflower Okay for a 13- or 14-Year-Old?

Most parents and educators feel it’s better for 15 and up. The drug use, sexual content and abuse revelation are significant. Some mature 14-year-olds read it with a parent’s involvement.

If your younger teen wants to read it, read it too so you can talk about the hardest parts.

What Parents Should Know

  • It’s frequently challenged. For sexual content, drugs and abuse.
  • The abuse revelation comes late. It’s handled carefully but can be upsetting.
  • It models therapy. Charlie gets help at the end.
  • The film is PG-13. It’s faithful and moving.
  • It’s a 1990s story. Music and mixtapes are a big part of it.

How to Tell If Your Child Is Ready for The Perks of Being a Wallflower

  • Read the first chapter yourself. Ten minutes with the opening pages tells you a lot about the tone of The Perks of Being a Wallflower.
  • Think about what upsets your child. Every child is different, so match the content table above to your own child rather than to their age alone.
  • Ask what they already know. Kids often hear about popular books from friends, so ask what they expect and why they want to read it.
  • Offer to read it together. Reading at the same time, or aloud, makes it easy to pause and talk about hard scenes.
  • Keep the door open. Tell your child they can stop at any time and come to you with questions.

A Simple Plan for Reading The Perks of Being a Wallflower Together

  1. Before reading: look at the cover and blurb together and ask what your child expects from The Perks of Being a Wallflower.
  2. While reading: check in every few chapters with one open question, such as “What surprised you?”
  3. After a hard scene: ask how it made them feel rather than what it means.
  4. After finishing: talk about the ending, then let your child choose what to read next from the suggestions below.

Questions to Talk About With Your Child

  • Why do you think Charlie writes letters to someone he doesn’t know?
  • What does it mean to “participate” in life?
  • How do Sam and Patrick help Charlie?
  • Why is it important for Charlie to get help?
  • What would you put on a mixtape for a friend?

If you or someone you know is struggling, you can call or text 988 to reach the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (US). If you or someone you know has experienced sexual assault, you can call the RAINN National Sexual Assault Hotline at 800-656-4673 (US).

If Your Teen Isn’t Ready Yet: Similar Books to Try

These coming-of-age stories suit different ages.

The Outsiders by S. E. Hinton: ages 12 and up. A teen struggles with loyalty and identity in this classic.

The Outsiders by S. E. Hinton book cover

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Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell: ages 14 and up. Two misfit teens fall in love over comics and mixtapes in 1986.

Eleanor & Park book cover

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Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Sáenz: ages 14 and up. Two teens form a deep friendship one summer in El Paso. It’s tender and award-winning.

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Sáenz book cover

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Related: what age The Catcher in the Rye is appropriate for and mental health books for teens.

Frequently Asked Questions

What age is The Perks of Being a Wallflower appropriate for?

It’s best for ages 15 and up, though some mature 14-year-olds read it with a parent.

Why is The Perks of Being a Wallflower banned?

It’s challenged for sexual content, drug use, suicide and sexual abuse themes.

Is there sex in The Perks of Being a Wallflower?

There are discussions of sex and some sexual situations, but nothing explicit.

Is the movie appropriate for teens?

The 2012 film is rated PG-13 for mature thematic material, drug and alcohol use, sexual content and a fight.

What should my teen read after Perks?

Eleanor & Park, Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe and The Catcher in the Rye are popular next reads.

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